I read the most startling news just last week that proved beyond reasonable doubt that indeed, a massive sex drive drives out common sense. In it, a 35 year old married gentleman, with a child happened to be an attendant at a hotel in Kisseman, a suburb of Accra. The same hotel a man and his wife had chosen to spend the night. I have no idea how hot the man’s wife was, but to the hotel attendant, she must have been hot enough to wait up for till 1am, climb in through the window and sexually assault, even with her husband lying just 9cm away on the same darn bed!!! http://dailyguideghana.com/newd/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=7963&Itemid=245

 Apparently, the woman thought it was her husband on top of her, when she realized it wasn’t and screamed and the lights were put on, there stood the 35yr old man, with a cloth covering his brains (which I think was around his lower abdominal area) and so much shame on his face there was no room for a fake smile, in fact, his face was looking stupid (hehehehe). But on a more serious note, that guy’s life will never be the same again; given that the woman’s filed a law suit, he’ll def pay some cash, mark some jail time, be ridiculed FOREVER, etc. but the most damning effect of his ‘stiff’ libido relevant to this piece is the effect on his family. I don’t know how long his marriage will last, but it’ll take more than even a blood covenant to keep his wife by his side through all this.

So so many marriages fall apart these days it’s frightening, and more often than not, it’s over infidelity. If you ask me, I think most (if not almost all) of the marriages that have passed 20 yrs have done so either because;

  1. The wife or husband(less likely) decided to stay behind anyways and work the marriage out.
  2. Someone was too scared to get divorced and start life afresh at that age.
  3. The children.

I happen to be acquainted with a number of gorgeous girls, so I know just too many stories about how a certain Mr. XXX  stopped by in his posh car and offered a ride and a mega shopping experience in exchange for met sexual needs. In fact I know of these 2 friends on campus who were doing this married man whose wife had just delivered a bouncy baby boy. Each of the two was feeling terrible that the other was tryna snatch ‘HER MAN’…and not that the man in question had a nursing wife at home! The point is, there are so many frustrated married men sleeping with i-need-ur-cash young girls that if you are shocked by it you are perceived as either prude or a JJC (Johnny Just Come).

So my question for the day is; what are the chances of you becoming part of the statistic of married men cheating on their wives (or vice versa)? It becomes disarmingly frightening when I look at men I perceive as better than me, more knowledgeable than I am, much much more spiritual than me sleeping around without any viscosity or restraint. It’s gotten to the point that if you’ve been married for even 3 years and u haven’t cheated on your spouse once , you are accorded the same level of shock and ridicule(in some cases) that will be given a 23 year old German virgin  (home of porn). Just this Monday my close friend told me that her father who’s also a professor’s been cheating on her mom, I read somewhere that a certain ‘man of God’ was delivering God’s gift of fertility personally to as many gullible women who dared come into his ‘MTN zone’(and they were quite a no.). So if you thought intellect or divine accolades exempted or indemnified you from an unrighteous hard-on, you’ve been screwed big time Mr.!

I really wanna be a good FAITHFUL husband some day, but what are my chances? What are yours? And F.Y.I, the beautiful/handsome ones have been born (waa look at me for e.g., lol), and  since we’re all getting richer by the week (some of us), the gold-digging babes will come the more. What’s the assurance that our sweethearts won’t be heartbroken by our infidelity? How many of us will be blackmailed with photos of our sexual indiscretion? How many of us will have our kids hating us for life because we broke up a beautiful family? How many of us will blame it on the alcohol, or the fog that clouded our vision to make us think the whore was our wife? Or the slippery floor that made as slip and fall right into the next available ‘hole’? or any other stupid excuse that what’s left of our brains can lay its hands on?

How many of us will sit moping behind a bottle of cheap whiskey, wishing we didn’t take that cute intern at work out to lunch instead of working out our salvations with fear and trembling? But even more worrying, how many of us won’t give a F**K about our indiscretions, and will see nothing wrong with it? Will we be good enough role models for our kids to look up to? Will our wives ever be all that we were looking for in a woman even if we waited a 100 years more? Will their insufficiencies legitimize our infidelity? Will it?

These are questions I can’t confidently answer for myself, because I’m aware that being confident about braveness even with a gun pointed at you and being brave when you are staring into the barrel of a 9mm are worlds apart. So I pray, I pray that God keeps my zipper up, even when I’m trying hardest to get it open. I pray that I don’t neutralize my conscience with the thoughts that so many more ‘respectable’ people are doing it. I pray because I doubt I have the strength, heck, I doubt any of us do, maybe we should all join hands and pray. Because seriously, the magnitude of damage (emotional, psychological, financial, spiritual, et al) done each family member and all those who know or look up to you by your infidelity is equivalent to the damage a nuclear bomb will do to a tropical rainforest.

So I’m looking at us 40 years from today, sipping on some tequila at an old school reunion or just a social hang-out (hopefully not a hospital), and reminiscing, looking at how tall our kids have grown, how good business is, and hopefully…how faithful we’ve been to our spouses…

Ps, tag as many ppl as u can to this note, especially those u think have a high MIR (Marital Infidelity Rate), hopefully a marital infidelity awareness just might be able to save a marriage someday…you never know, or u can update your status with this link(http://wp.me/pNx4E-1m) to support the cause…if u think it’s worth it, is it?